The Alan Test

Principle: If you open a book to any page and start reading, you should be able to glean enough from a random sample of text to reveal the merits of the whole.

Subject: “The Spread Eagles,” an exploration of modern feminist theory, viewed through the prism of a raunchy, ultra-violent, lesbian biker film.

Experiment Location: A friend’s office, where the script in question was found on the floor while organizing and looking for things to feed into his brand new paper shredder.

Random Sample: “Holy Hooters, Steve!  When did the milk lady start delivering pizza?!”

Conclusions: My friend should have bought a bigger shredder.

-TC